Instead of competing in sports like figure skating or swimming, New Jersey colleges and universities will focus on all the things that they do best: pork roll eating (or taylor ham, as some call it; this publication will not take a stance on what the breakfast meat is actually called in the interest of protecting our staff), “Jersey Shore” quotes trivia, and much more.
Ava Cappuccilli, a freshman psychology and criminal justice major, said that she believes competing schools, like Rutgers, will “suck at everything.”
“They don’t have Elizabeth Ann Seton looking over them,” she said.
On the other hand, John Artuso, a junior political science major, said that Rutgers would be SHU’s biggest competitor, building on the “beef” the two universities already have.
“I feel like it would be a USA versus Russia kind of thing,” Artuso said.
These Games will be hosted by MetLife Stadium, and all of New Jersey’s four-year colleges will participate.
According to reports, Princeton University originally refused to participate, citing a “previous commitment of studying 24/7 to maintain our place as the best Ivy,” but caved once students realized they’d get a week off from school.
Winners will compete for the ultimate prize: Deciding if Central Jersey exists.
Artuso said that SHU would excel at the highway jersey sliding competition, citing “aggressive” Jersey drivers and the behavior he’s seen in the SHU parking lots. He also said that students at SHU may struggle to win the Bruce Springsteen impression event, saying that a lot of students may not know The Boss.
An N.J. university that may also provide some steep competition to SHU, according to freshman nursing major Grace Gaffrey, would be Monmouth in the best beach spot competition, a university in Springsteen’s old stomping grounds.
“Monmouth is close to the beach, but I want Seton Hall to win, obviously. Because go Pirates,” Gaffrey said.
Other events in these Olympics include Sopranos trivia and Monopoly & boardwalk games.
Seton Hill University was also invited to the sporting event. When reached, a representative for the university said that the university was “confused with the Hall.”
“It wasn’t the first time, and it certainly won’t be the last,” they said.
Because the formal invitation was already extended, Seton Hill will still attend, saying it couldn’t turn down the opportunity to “cook” their opponents.
Jacqueline Litowinsky is a copy editor and the assistant editor for The Setonian’s Social Media. She can be reached at jacqueline.litowinsky@student.shu.edu.
